I recently took a class in Continental knitting. Having learned the English  method, I was jealous of the speedy, smooth stitching my Continental friends were doing. I was determined to change my throwing ways to picking.

So, I learned the Continental style like five minutes ago. And I’m starting a new project – perfect time to switch knitting techniques, right? Oh, yeah, brilliant idea. My new fingerless gloves project  involves ribbing. And double-pointed needles. And striping.

Somewhere there is a  Knitters’ Big Book of No-No’s prescribing tenets like 1. Thou Shalt Not Start the New Method until You’ve Practiced A Lot. 2. Thou Shall Start With a Simple Project 3. A Simple Project Shall Not Consist of DPNs and A Glove of Many Colors, and finally, 4. Thou Shalt Not Resort to Mixing in English Stitches Even If Thou Becomest Miffed and Frustrated.

So far I have turned blue because I concentrate so hard I forget to breathe. I’ve had to break out a box of kleenex (although, to be fair, some of the tears may be residual from watching “Marley and Me”). I’ve created stitches so tight that and tense the fabric is one big pucker. I’ve broken all the rules in the Knitters’ Big Book of No-No’s.

I’m on row 4.